Chamber CD - Day 30

Tuesday, December 05, 2006
12:20 PM

Still working on my drum rudiments. The practice is giving me a lot of insight that I hope will translate to great writing.

Then I worked on that slow piece. It’s a struggle that one. Everything I come up with seems too wishy-washy, too jazzy, too film score like, too impressionistic, too blah! I am starting to have anxiety in the morning before I come down to work on this piece. I have to relax about it.

This is composition as problem solving: having a goal and figuring out how to get there. Like coming up with a thousand ways NOT to build a light bulb. So I am getting pages and pages of rejected ideas and hours spent at the piano, trying out this and that.

Because this piece is a problem I need to solve, I am only working on it, nothing else. I find that being immersed in a problem is the best way to solve it. I was in the shower when I thought that quartalism in a bi-tonal/bi-modal context might be a good way to get the sound I am looking for.

And it does sound pretty good. I am not sure it has that pure, bright, wistful sound that tonal writing can have, though.

Will I end up writing tonal music? God, it would be so easy.

The instrumentation is also giving me a bit of a headache. I have flute and vibes in mind, but I am not sure. Perhaps flute and sting trio? I need to keep things small for this project.

Also, the fact that it is taking so long is causing me some stress. My wife says I always do that, I never take the easy road. I never do what comes easy and I look and look and get stressed out. She’s right.

I never trust an idea that was easy to get.